I think everyone has been asked this question at least once in their life.
Is there a God?
What is a “God”?
All these questions without answers, I sigh at them. Why even try answering when there is no possible way to find an answer? I sigh at their stupidity.
All throughout the time of my existence, I have never, not even once, been serious in anything. And yet, I have gained everything.
I, who never once studied, graduated top of my class. I, who never worked, am rich. I, who knows nothing, understand everything. I, who has never loved, is adored by millions.
Unfair, you say?
Well, life is unfair. The whole world is unfair. Nothing in the entire universe is “fair”. In this world where dog eats dog, it is the survival of the fittest. As long as you win, nothing else matters. Results are everything.
Just how have I become like this?
A prodigy in everything; a natural gift in excelling at everything – is due to what is stored in my mind.
Memories of my past lives, to be exact.
I have reincarnated more time that I could count. And each time I reincarnate, it is always different, always a new world. I have never been in a world twice, though they may be some similarities between them, it’s subtly different.
Once, I lived in a modern world where life is literally a game (MMORPG-like). Once, I lived as a master assassin. Once, I lived as a renowned scholar who won many Nobel prizes. Once, I lived my entire life playing video games. Once, I lived my life as an Emperor. Once, I lived my life as the Hero who saved the world from the Demon Lord. Once, I lived as the Demon Lord who ruled the world.
All my knowledge, all my experiences is what makes me, me.
How did I reincarnate?
I forgot that a long time ago. Maybe I was a magician who never wanted to die. Maybe I was a king who wanted to rule forever. Maybe I was cursed. Maybe I was blessed. Who knows.
Whatever happened, happened.
If there really is a “God”, then “God” should have never let me keep on reincarnating. “God” should have punished my sorry ass in “Hell” for desecrating and devaluing life. “God” should have destroyed my soul already. “God” should have destroyed my everything. God is not real. There is no God.
People say “you only live once”, then why the hell do I keep on living? Why do I die, and just revive? Why am I the only one like this? What purpose do I have? Why am I in this world? Just what purpose do I keep on rising from the grave for?
…why am I even alive?
Well, that’s how it is. This is my life, and currently, my life is that of a man 20 years of age and is a student and secretly an actor.
Today, I am about to go to school.
After living for such a long time, I wonder why I am still going to school. It’s a great mystery.
In my current life, I live alone in an apartment since my parents have died 5 years prior. Since I am already a fine adult, I am quite fine living all by myself. And with the money from my work, and from other various sources, I can sustain myself, financially.
I am going to school (University).
Since school is only slightly close, within walking distance, I walk there every day.
Somewhere along the way, I heard people arguing under early buzz of the morning.
What is this about, I wonder.
It’s a pain. I don’t want to be involved. Even though I think that, they’re positioned in between me and the school.
Let’s just gracefully ignore them as I pass by.
“—that’s why you—“
“No, you’re the one—“
Entering my sight seemed to be three high school students having a lover’s quarrel.
Two guys and one female.
It seemed like the two males are quarreling over the girl, and the girl, which is the cause of the problem, is trying to mediate.
(Hah, how useless.)
I sigh at the trio.
Love is dead. Love is just an illusion created by the mind. It’s just caused by our instinct to reproduce and keep our race surviving throughout the ages.
Although I had also had some experience in a situation like this. In a past life, I had once loved a woman but since she was already seeing someone else, I backed off. First come, first serve. The early bird gets the worm. Such is the law of nature.
In all honesty, I think they should at least act mature enough to mind the place where they were arguing. It’s early in the morning in a relatively residential area. Please try not to wake someone up, at least.
I think the two guys, in case they do not find a solution to resolve their problem, should have something like a showdown or a competition. May the best man win, or something like that.
Or maybe the female should just choose a partner already, rather be a indecisive wimp, like a protagonist in a harem anime or manga.
Well, that is just my opinion of the matter. This is none of my business. Let’s find another route to school.
Suddenly, in that instant, I realized.
A truck was speeding towards the trio at a speed higher than the speed limit.
Also, the driver of the truck was lying prone on the wheel.
He was driving in a sleep-deprived state.
And the three still hadn’t noticed.
“Hey! You three!”
I tried to warn them by yelling, but they didn’t notice me as well, since their fight was reaching its climax from a fight of words, in was heading towards a fight of fists.
Well, I tried.
It’s not my duty to save them, nor is it my responsibility. I pray for these poor souls. May they reincarnate just like me.
Let’s head back.
I ordered my body to turn the other way.
When I noticed it, my body had already covered half of the distance between me and the trio; I was sprinting at them for some reason.
“…what the hell…”
I quietly muttered to myself.
It seems that one of the personalities of my past life, possibly a Hero, had instinctively rushed at them.
I sigh at my stupidity.
Whatever, let’s get this done quickly or else, my homeroom teacher will scold me again. She’s scary when she gets mad.
It can’t be helped then…
“Hey, you three!”
I yelled much louder than earlier.
That got their attention.
“H-Huh?” (anon female)
“What?” (anon male)
They had looked dumbfounded as a man was sprinting at them.
The truck was just about 15 seconds away from them.
I reached them.
I grabbed the girl first and pulled her away from the truck’s trajectory.
The two males registered my words in their brains and looked behind them and stood stock still and started trembling, probably from the fear of death. Like a deer caught in front of headlights at night.
Why are you just standing still… seriously, do you want to die?
The truck is now 5 seconds away from impact.
It can’t be helped.
I pushed the two out of the way in a hurry.
And due to that, I lost my balance.
I was sent flying onto a concrete wall by a truck way heavier than me at speeds that easily surpass human capabilities.
It hurts… shit.
I probably broke a few ribs. Since I’m having a hard time breathing and every breath feels like someone is stabbing me, I may have also punctured a lung. I can’t feel my left arm, so I may have broke that as well.
If it’s just this much, I can expect a full recovery in about 6 – 8 months.
But, the truck hasn’t stopped moving.
It was still running, charging towards me.
I guess this is it.
Another life sacrificed.
The truck kept on charging towards me with no signs of stopping.
In a few seconds, I’ll be tomato sauce.
In a few seconds, I’ll be sandwiched between a truck and a wall.
It’s not a good way to die.
A few seconds later, I had died.